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Blog

Changing Mindsets

6/10/2019

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One of the greatest challenges I had in building my career was finding the right people to surround myself with. It's a common saying that you are who you hang out with. I find this to be incredibly true. I was born into a world of pessimism. I was told that one in a million people became rock stars so you might as well not even try. But today, I live in a world where I'm surrounded by rock stars. It's made me realize that whether or not you become a rock star is not just contingent on your destiny but also on your decisions and tenacity to work hard to be that one in a million. 

I grew up in a world believing it was impossible to build a living as a dancer, especially because I didn't start ballet by the age of 3. However, today, my entire income comes from dancing. The greatest key to making this happen was by letting go of everyone who told me it was impossible. I learned to stop surrounding myself with people who told me I couldn't and started finding people who told me a could. Once that happened, my entire world was unlocked.
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Best handstand teacher ever. Go take @maximsedochenkoff classes at @aerialwarehouse !!!

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Today, I live an incredible life that is designed by me. My days consist of waking up whenever I want. Training in the apparatuses I love and ending my days making money dancing or hanging from a ceiling. And the best part is, there was no trade off. Like every artist, I paid my dues and spent a few nights with no meals. But once my dues were paid, and once I really came to a point of believing in myself, things changed. These days, I never worry about missing a meal. I don't have to share a room or live in a slump. Instead I have the beautiful luxury of waking up and walking outside to a patio surrounded by beautiful trees with the beach a ten minute drive away.


                                         ~~~~~


For some reason, society has ingrained it in our minds that we have to either be happy and poor or rich and unhappy. Both are false. Being rich starts with a mindset, continues with hard work and ends in peace. It takes time to master because of all the societal norms that have been forced on us. But once it's unlocked, it's the most incredible thing. â€‹
All the same, I didn't achieve everything that I have so far by good vibes alone. It also took an awful lot of sacrifices. I was born into a pessimistic family and then chose a pessimistic marriage. My beginning story never should have allowed me to make it as far as I did. It wasn't until one terrible morning of being shaken to my core that I realized I no longer wanted to spend the rest of my life unhappy. That single experience pushed me to cut ties and move forward. I let go of all my friendships and relationships that were so incredibly pessimistic and entered a new community where no one knew my story or who I was. I dyed my hair blue and decided to laugh and live and love as if I had just been born into the world. My life was never the same after that. Only good things began happening.
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Naturally, it was incredibly painful letting go of so many friendship and relationships. I had to go through a divorce and cut emotional ties with my blood family. Both things were painful and scary. I had spent my entire life fighting to not be alone. But at the end of the day, I had to CHOOSE to be alone for the sake of my own mental and emotional health. Coming to the point of realizing I was a struggling artist in LA with absolutely no safety net and no one who would always have my back was one of the most terrifying and soul crushing realizations of my life. And it was one that I had no choice but to accept. I stopped trying to fill the hole and allowed myself to experience the hurt that came with being alone rather than trying to find something (probably something or someone unhealthy) to fill it.
Only then did my new found family finally have the space find it's way into my life.
More often than not, it takes letting go of everything to finally find what was always meant to be. You have to be able conquer the fear of being alone and having nothing. By allowing yourself to be in that position, you naturally make room for all the good things that were always meant to be.
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