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Blog

Greece - Changing

4/8/2020

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​It took time, but eventually, I was able to transform my entire life. I dyed by hair blue and purple and my burlesque career began taking off. I started performing around the city as Alicia Cirque, sensual cirque extraordinaire. People in Santa Monica and Hollywood came to know me as a bendy, stripping, flying aerialist. I began training relentlessly and picked up as many shows as I possibly could. Legally, I changed my name back to my original maiden name. Luckily, though, everyone was already calling me Alicia, which made my slip into a new world where no one knew me easy.

However, friends and family back home started seeing what I was doing. I began receiving a number of text messages telling me how I was falling down a dark and dangerous path. At first, I took these messages as hurtful things. I was finally becoming a healthy and happy person. More than that, I was becoming an empowered confident woman who could stand on her own two feet by herself. I felt better than I had ever felt! And yet, I was receiving so much criticism for just being me. I could have sunk back into my victimized state and gone back to being the submissive religious girl. But I was finally happy and I finally knew how to stand up for myself.

So I said fuck that and decided to live.

Through my burlesque connections, I landed a job as the co-star of the long time running magic show Magicopolis. I had four shows every weekend in a magic theater. It was a two man show so I had a full script and had to learn how to do magic. Between that show and burlesque, I was becoming a part-time performer. I had also landed a job as a part-time assistant to a small family foundation. It gave me a chance to use my business skills. More than that, I was starting to make my dreams happen while also beginning to provide comfortably for myself. I was finally learning to stand on my own two feet while becoming the woman I wanted to be and creating the life I wanted to live.

In between my magic shows, I would go down to the beach to workout. It was at this beach where I began to meet some of my soon to be best friends who taught me how to be strong and confident on my own. Eventually, I made a friend who agreed to be my roommate. We were lucky enough to find a house in Bel Air that suited all our needs, especially my needs for having a giant mastiff puppy that was growing bigger and bigger every day. It took a lot of time and work, but eventually, I had become everything I wanted to be on my own. 

But I still felt a little crazy. 

One day, I was sitting in the office at my specialty foundation. I was a little bored and bummed that I didn't have the energy to train. I felt that sitting at a desk was slowing down my training and goals to be in the circus. I was also sleeping around a lot and having the time of my life, but running from my problems. I looked at the blue in my hair and realized it was time to start maturing. I remembered the book Eat. Pray. Love. and how her world travels helped her face herself and overcome her problems. I decided it was finally time for me to take my trip. 

​So I booked a ticket for Greece.

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